Wednesday, October 29, 2008

time flies

I didn’t realise I haven’t blogged for awhile. Time so bloody FLIES! Is it coming to November already??? What the hell happened to July, August, September and October??

Omg thinking back from July onwards only so much has happened and yet I barely felt time going by. I went to Seoul and back, Tokyo and back, Singapore and back, Hong Kong and back, Phuket and back, we got the new car, I got a new dog, RENEE WAS BORN, RENEE HAD HER FULL MOON……….and I’m now in the midst of preparing for my bloody long trip to the Middle East. Dammit – the only thing I probably forgot to do in these 4 months was to get married, migrate to Alaska, shave my head bald and adopt a child.

Is it just me or does everyone else feel the same? I’m beginning to panic and my heart is palpating. In 7 months I will be 29, in 19 months I will be FUCKING 30!!! OMG OMG OMG………breatheeeeeee

And in another 2 months or so I will feel obligated (to myself) to do like a stupid new year review / resolution and then I’m going to realise that nothing much has changed. Blardy hell lah. I know that part about losing weight has failed again – but anyway it has been failing for the last 5 years or so …. So …….whatever lah. At least this time I have an excuse. I’m in my freaking LATE TWENTIES already and my metabolism rate has dropped so scientifically speaking that should probably make me….err….. more well padded? And because I’m in my LATE TWENTIES now I’m probably in denial or in a bad mood about reaching the big three “O” and if you have any grey matters left in your head you’d not want to bring that up. Done. I think I even have enough self pity excuses now to not put this back on the list. I can be so fucking positive like that. ;-)

Jokes aside what probably scares me most is that I am only biologically maturing but I am not emotionally and mentally maturing. I sometimes still feel as if I think like how I used to think 5 years ago, like nothing has changed. Sure my values and beliefs have evolved somewhat but deep down inside I suspect that the last few years are forcing me to portray a very superficial outlook on many things in life….. it’s not that I do this on purpose. I am just unsure how much of me has truly grown with the years.

I also think growing up confuses you and makes you a more confusing person. Very random post, this one.....but what to do..... I'm feeling extremely random now.

Good nite. :-)